Working a long distance, especially in a relationship with someone you love, is no easy feat.
With limited phone and email contact and even less in-person time to spend together, working your relationship can be tough.
Clean ERSJ has some more information about how to work a long distance relationship.
Thankfully there are many resources you can draw from in order to help this difficult challenge work in your favor:
1) It’s important that both parties be as flexible as possible.
Make sure they know the rules of the road for this unusual situation and make an effort not to nitpick or micromanage their behavior (or your lack thereof) during this time apart.
Problems can arise if they feel you have no interest in their well being, so make sure that they know that your lack of physical contact is not a reflection on your feelings for them.
2) Facetime is important.
It doesn’t matter if you’re face to face or via webcam, make sure that you spend time together talking to each other on a regular basis.
Set up phone dates with each other twice a week (taking no other calls during this time) and use your webcam for an evening chat once a week.
No excuses! Remember, you are still in a relationship, no matter how distant it may seem.
3) Be creative.
If using email or texting doesn’t work for you try something else! Develop an Instant Message screen name and connect with them via MSN or AIM during off times at work.
Get creative and use whatever tools you can. Remember, distance is no excuse for not speaking to each other!
4) Be honest.
No one likes to feel deceived or lied to, so make sure you are both honest with each other even if it means telling the truth.
If you find yourself lying about not talking to each other because of different working hours or differing schedules make sure you don’t do this any more. Honesty is the golden rule in every relationship.
5) Fantasize.
If you have a hard time with the physical absence of your partner, use your imagination to fill in the blanks. With some things, a picture is worth a thousand words.
When you can’t be together or when they’re not available on any other form of communication, try to imagine how they’re feeling and what they’re thinking about. They may be missing you as much as you miss them.
6) Revel in the moment.
Spend time on creating good solid memories together and revel in those precious moments that no one can take away from you.
Be sure to make lists of all the great times you’ve had together, dreams of future memories and anything else that adds positively to your relationship experience.
7) Think positively.
Put yourself in your partner’s shoes. Try to imagine how difficult it is for them to get through the day without you, how they’re missing you and how lonely they are.
If you can manage to do this for even half of an hour then break through the long distance barrier together! You’ll be doing yourself a favor.
8) Come up with time saving ideas.
There are some ways to keep up on each other’s lives without being apart too long at all. Try not to worry so much about getting out of bed in the morning so you don’t get so tired.
Make sure you keep up on important work projects together or try to think of other ways to keep in touch with each other than just through your phone.
If your job requires long hours away from home for its success, look into working at home programs using your computer and Internet access to help it go by quicker. Get creative!
9) Give them time.
Sometimes distance can act as a barrier that makes you feel like your life is incomplete without your partner, but this isn’t always the case. It takes time for things to settle back into place and for two people to adjust to the reality of living apart again.
Give them time and don’t take it personally if they aren’t able to get back into the swing of things right away.
They may just need a little more time than you do before things work out. Be patient, sincere and understanding and things should go well in the long run!
10) Don’t overdo it!
You can drive yourself crazy trying to keep up with each other through email or texting all day long, but there is a point where you can go overboard and it will cast a shadow on your relationship.
Be careful not to send too many text messages or email, trying to keep each other on the same page.
